I’ll admit that I feel unqualified to post on this topic. But, it rather reminded me of “Good Luck to You, Leo Grande,” in which the always amazing Emma Thompson hires a young male sex worker to help her appreciate having sex again. It’s actually quite a lovely film that is far more about intimacy than sex.
Thank you so much for this article validating that Disabled Persons are sexual beings, too. So often we are infantilized or written off as not experiencing desire.
Tantric coaches are already a thing so I see no reason why sex doulas shouldn’t exist. My partner and I are both autistic and have physical disabilities, too. And yeah, having someone “spot” us could be quite useful!
Think about how much more satisfied people would be with their sex lives if they had someone teaching them what their bodies can do and how to maximize their sessions!
If you lived next door, I'd slam half a pint of scotch and be over in 5 minutes.
As it is, unfortunately, it's going to take some time to create this as a thing. The best idea I've had so far is just to put up a post on FetLife. (Kind of a Facebook for people in to BDSM, I guess? I've never used Facebook, so take that comparison with a grain of salt.) There are some truly kind and generous people on FetLife, and while they may **also** like the idea of watching you get it on (because voyeurism is a thing, and this is a fetish site after all) people with the right personalities probably exist on FetLife, and without being able to talk explicitly about what you need and want, you won't get it. Since FetLife encourages people talking explicitly about what they need and want, that's just the best environment I currently know about to go seeking someone who could play that role (or to advertise yourself for that role, if you're looking to help other people that way).
When we were a bunch of cripples chatting about it privately in a. living room after dinner and drinks, we rarely seriously considered that this would be a paying gig anytime soon. Doulas in the short term are gonna have to settle for the satisfaction of a human well done.
I’ll admit that I feel unqualified to post on this topic. But, it rather reminded me of “Good Luck to You, Leo Grande,” in which the always amazing Emma Thompson hires a young male sex worker to help her appreciate having sex again. It’s actually quite a lovely film that is far more about intimacy than sex.
Thank you so much for this article validating that Disabled Persons are sexual beings, too. So often we are infantilized or written off as not experiencing desire.
Tantric coaches are already a thing so I see no reason why sex doulas shouldn’t exist. My partner and I are both autistic and have physical disabilities, too. And yeah, having someone “spot” us could be quite useful!
Think about how much more satisfied people would be with their sex lives if they had someone teaching them what their bodies can do and how to maximize their sessions!
Where do I sign up?
If you lived next door, I'd slam half a pint of scotch and be over in 5 minutes.
As it is, unfortunately, it's going to take some time to create this as a thing. The best idea I've had so far is just to put up a post on FetLife. (Kind of a Facebook for people in to BDSM, I guess? I've never used Facebook, so take that comparison with a grain of salt.) There are some truly kind and generous people on FetLife, and while they may **also** like the idea of watching you get it on (because voyeurism is a thing, and this is a fetish site after all) people with the right personalities probably exist on FetLife, and without being able to talk explicitly about what you need and want, you won't get it. Since FetLife encourages people talking explicitly about what they need and want, that's just the best environment I currently know about to go seeking someone who could play that role (or to advertise yourself for that role, if you're looking to help other people that way).
I fear that those that need it most (living on a meager disability payment) wouldn't be able to afford it. But other than that, it's a good idea.
When we were a bunch of cripples chatting about it privately in a. living room after dinner and drinks, we rarely seriously considered that this would be a paying gig anytime soon. Doulas in the short term are gonna have to settle for the satisfaction of a human well done.
Very satisfying read.
< lights cigarette >